I’m Not a Hater!!!!

After a scathing (yet cathartic!) post like my previous one, I feel like I need to sing the praises of my beloved regulars, Amazonian and otherwise…….nicknames have been inserted to protect the innocent (or leave a shadow of doubt in the guilty).  Y’all know who you are, so thank you for filling my life with joy–or at least amusing me with your antics.

I’ll start with Amazon because, well, it’s a short list:

The ones I adored…..

  • The kind-hearted, cute-as-a-button academic ginger who made a point of bringing someone new to IC every time she visited
  • The trio of awkward, nerdy 20-something guys who always had a smile and a generous tip hand
  • The spunky, punky-haired chick with the sweet bulldog (he was only in it for the biscuits)

The ones I found at least mildly amusing….

  • The guy who would throw down $100 + tip in advance for a week’s worth of coffee and beer (which made me feel sort of like a prostitute, in all honesty)
  • The dudes 30 years apart in age who may or may not be aware that they’re actually attracted to one another…..and who slammed their ceramic cups down on my counter and shouted “MEXICAN MOCHA” before their turn (let alone before I could manage to spit out “good morning”)

OK, now I feel better.  Let’s move on to the steadfast regulars who made my life livable for 4 years:

When Kapow! Coffee (the greatest coffee stand SLU will ever have)…..got kicked out of their space by a greedy landlord who then opened Nollie’s (where the worst coffee, perhaps in the entire Seattle area, can now be found), we adopted all–or at least a vast majority–of their regulars.

The ones we loved….

  • The architect/motorcycle enthusiast whose coffee order and process was the same every time, and whose smiling conversation was always appreciated on good and bad days alike
  • The handful of IT guys from the medical research facility down the street (one of which helped us get our beer tap system up and running!) who were just happy to get a few moments out of the office for some coffee and a few laughs
  • The gaggle of guys (and sometimes gals) from the nearby credit card processing (?) business who provided my early morning–and sometimes midday–giggles.  Sometimes they would arrive in pairs, sometimes the entire herd would descend upon the coffee counter like friend confetti that just needs a little caffeine to get airborne.  Oh, so many inside jokes and nicknames were born here.  We really should have broadcast it as a radio show……

The ones we’ll never forget…

  • Sometimes your coffee order becomes your nickname, either because we don’t know your actual name or because you’re annoying and we want to be able to talk about you (and by “talk about” I mean make fun of) without compromising your anonymity.  For example, “White Chocolate McDouche” always orders a white chocolate mocha and proceeds to irritate everyone within earshot for at least 10 minutes with whatever he’s an expert on today.
  • The crazy dude I already knew from prior years in the bookstore biz with no volume control and a whole lot of opinions about city politics…..and trains, for some reason.  This is a guy who can pick up a conversation right where it left off a year ago or more, and the funny part is you still won’t care!

As we approach the one year mark of our hiatus (July 3rd), this ode to my regulars shall continue.

One Response to “I’m Not a Hater!!!!”
  1. Debbie Miller says:

    It’s nice to get your updates! We miss Inner Chapters but realize your life was getting more complicated – hope all’s well.

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